Rooftop bars in melbourne

There are a multitude of different venues in the Melbourne CBD that run rooftop and courtyard bars. 

To list a few examples there are 

• Rooftop Bar and Cinema, @ Curtain House, Level 6, 252 Swanston Street.

• Section 8 Container Bar, @ 27-29 Tattersalls Lane.

• Transit Lounge, @ Transport Hotel Complex, Level 3, Federation Square

• Blue Diamond[1], @ Level 15, 123 Queen St 

• Riverland Bar and Café, @ Federation Wharf, St Kilda Road Melbourne

•  The Order of Melbourne, @ Level 2, 401 Swanston Street.
 

 

These venues started popping up about the time that the Victorian State Labour Government banned smoking in all non “open to the air” licensed venues (Apart from the Casino of course. But then the state government’s money has to come from somewhere doesn’t it?)

Anyways….

There is a company that seems to specialise in setting up bars that provide this experience.

Chalker Enterprises.

Chalker Enterprises. Pty. Ltd owns many fine boozing parlours such as Gin Palace[2], Madam Brussels[3], Collins Quarter[4]. They also had a hand in ‘The Order’ for a bit but I believe that relationship has ended. 

Now I did a brief stint with Chalker and they were awesome. I wish that the relationship could have lasted longer but I was stressed and really needed a holiday. (MCUC hasn’t had a holiday in about six years.) Unfortunately I was broke and need work so to Chalker I came calling. 

Now the place I wanted to work was Collins Quarter. Collins quarter is a combination café, pub, restaurant, cocktail-bar and cigar lounge (Not that they’re going overboard or anything.). It situated at the “top end” of Collins Street and caters to the general milieu of bankers, lawyers, and politicians that find this area as their natural habitat. 

Now a lot of hospitality staff consider these sorts of customers to be, in a word, cunts[5]. I will admit that they are hard to deal with. Essentially they are law, liberal arts and commerce students that are finally earning heaps of money and now think they form “Regency of the Universe”; possibly because they actually do.

But I personally don’t think they’re that hard to please. All you have to do is give them everything that they want and then politely ask them to pay for it. And because they have the money they actually do.

The food at the order looks and smells and tastes amazing. It's directed to the raging carnivore that burns inside all of us that actually want muscle tone and that wonderful feeling of being packed with delecious, roasted meat. The down-side to this is that the pub, cocktail bar and cigar lounge feel a bit ancilliary, like they're tacked on. Collins has one great product (The food.) and a range of good products, (Beer, wine, cocktails and cigars.) and these seem a little neglected. The only people who really get involved are hospitality industry types who know that these things are there (See foot-notes for reference to hospitality types.) and any of the aformentioned lawyers, bankers, politicians that have predilictions for these fine things.

I did one shift at Collins and unfortunately there was fuck all to do. Everything I could do for them was being done by somebody else and it left me a bit idle. (Which I don’t mind as long as I get paid, but anyway.) 

So they sent me packing to The Order of Melbourne.

The Order is situated opposite RMIT in the Melbourne CBD and thus caters to students, academics and for some reason, lots of cute, arty women also with lots of tattoos and the attached, big, burly dudes with lots of tattoos.

This may have something to do with fact that the place specialises in putting on shows. (Quirky fashion catwalks, burlesque, 1950s Pin-Up Girl competitions, music, comedy etc, etc…). So much fun. “Es ist like Berlin in the zee 30s ja? Zo many interezting thingz....”. 

So I got sent to work in a caberet theatre. Now will just say this: I love caberet. I love going to shows, meeting the people, hanging out, drinking interesting drinks and occasionally cheering the stage…..

Not while I’m working!

Not while I’m stressed!

It makes me jumpy and unfortunately when I get jumpy I snap at people. Not good when one is a service professional. Also I’m a complete insomniac from years of working in clubs and it’s something I'd really like to fix so when I say I want restaurant work don’t, DO NOT! send me to work in a nightclub. Jerks.

So anyways, long story short, ‘The Order’ and I did not work out. Pity. It’s a good company and they pay their very lovely bartenders very well. I would point out flaws but that would be nitpicking (A bad habit of mine.).

5 shots of whiskey for Chalker Enterprises. Great company with many fine establishments in its holster. Long may it prosper.

1) Not really outdoors I know but it is the top level of a skyscraper does have a massive balcony. The view is incredible. 

2) Not rooftop bar. As far as I know  anyway. Maybe they’re hiding something.

3) A preppy, summer sports themed, roof-top garden.

4) A watering hole and restaurant for lawyers, politicians and other miscellaneous scum from the top end of Collins

5) Most hospo kids would like to serve musicians, artists and other hospo kids all day long. This is stupid because these people have no money and thus often can’t pay. (Myself included.)